Purpose and Pushing

What is purpose?
We, humans, need something, a reason, not to survive - we can do that and barely exist at all - but to push.
We could simply float, coast on a draft, maybe one that is stirred by someone else, who has purpose. This requires no purpose. This requires no thought.
But humans are not content with this existence. This is stagnation. We mold and decay without working, without pushing.
We need to push. It works on our beings as exercise does on our bodies. It tones, sharpens, and clarifies existence.
I feel vaguely guilty when I haven't worked, really strained in a while. Not to some external party, like parental figures, but to myself. I feel that I owe myself more with my life. I, in the present, am forever indebted to my future self. I am his bondslave, and I work for his fulfillment.
What will he deem my purpose to be? What would set me free?
I, in the future, would assuredly release myself from this method of thinking. I feel that the answers that that I holds lie at the end of an entirely different route of thoughts.
I know that what I need is not more work. Pushing in every direction yields little result. I need a concentration of effort. And for that I need clarity, not of my own existence - I seem to have come to terms with that quite well - I need clarity of my purpose.
How can I gain clarity of purpose without becoming too attached to a desire? Is a purpose a desire in disguise?
Would a Tao master seek his purpose, or take comfort in not knowing his purpose?
I have heard some gurus expound on the difference of the desire to be one with God from other desires, that the desire for God is a sort of divine desire. But even this does not quite ring true for me.
I feel that I should seek out the true nature of reality, simply because it is what is. If that is not worth knowing, then what is?